Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Morning Fears

I am walking through the library with my babies looking for my husband. I call him on his cell phone, he doesn't answer. I finally find him on the fifth floor. As I reach him, I hear the ominous tones of the bell. The sound resounds around the library walls, piercing our cores. We fearfully look at each other.

"We are under attack! Hurry to the shelter!" the loudspeaker screams.

My husband takes one baby, I take the other. We hurry to the stairs.

In the rush of people, I lose my husband and my baby.

I call him on his cell phone, terrified because the planes are coming closer. I am hysterically sobbing. Suddenly, I hear an explosion.

I wake up.

Manly is making dinosaur noises next to me. I look over and find him staring at me. 

I hear my husband taking a shower in the bathroom.

The Queen's giggles in the next room remind me the day has started.

It was a dream. Only a dream.

The sun's rays stream through the blinds. It is morning.

I cradle Manly in my arms. He begins to cry, rooting around my breasts trying to find nourishment. I pick him up, and roll out of bed. I scoop the Queen out of her crib. We both run to the bathroom and greet Mr. B. I hug him tight. He holds me. I breathe in his delicious scent. I allow his strong arms to bring solace.

It was a dream. Only a dream.


I bring the Queen to the kitchen and gently place her in her high chair. I pour cereal into a bowl and deposit it on her tray. I sit down and quietly nurse Manly. Mr. B sits next to me. He kisses my cheek and tells me he loves me.

I am happy. I have my family around me, safe and sound. My children's noises and husband's chatter dissipate the lingering sadness.

The assiduous sound of the ticking clock reminds me to get moving.The day has started, diapers and clothes to change, beds to make, and I need to shower.

As I stand up, I offer a prayer of gratitude. I thank God that it was only a dream.

5 comments:

  1. Dreams tell us so much about who we are and what we want. I think they also tell us about what we fear. As evinced here, they also shed light on the bounty of our waking hours.

    It was a dream. Only a dream.

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  2. I'm lucky that I never have nightmares (although I have had dream fights with husband and woke up irritated for no good reason).

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  3. What a scary dream. I usually don't remember my dreams as soon as I wake up.

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  4. What an intense experience! Funny how a nightmare can be a gift - the dark that helps us to prize the light.

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  5. Dreams like that sure let us know what we HAVE, don't we?

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