I have a mantra: every moment counts, if you live for tomorrow then all the todays will be used up. This is what holds me together when I think about what I am doing-wife, mom, school, and homemaker. Sometimes I feel like I have been chewed up and spit out, other times I feel like the energizer bunny. It is in the times of sorrow that I realize I need an outlet. This is where writing is heaven. I can write out all my feelings that I repress during the day, too afraid to look at what I am thinking. These thoughts are those oh, so horrible thoughts.
I have an obsession with thinking. I am also a very passionate person (volatile in the mfhd world). These two clash together and create major migraines. These are the times that my husband needs an umbrella to protect him from the outpouring of words that greet him at the end of the day when he walks through the door: heydidyouwatchthenews? Iswearthatitkillsme. I normally do not take breaths in between my words, so my husband has to have me repeat them (if he dares).
So the point in all this? I have no idea. That is where the problem lies, I think without any direction. So, this is why I write. To put all my ideas into one coherent whole. Ah, I am rambling again. I think this tendency began while I was pregnant, when my brain began degenerating.
In order to end this never ending thought process I must finish. So, to sum up what I am trying to say- I write to remember that the place that I am in right now will end eventually. Until that day, I will love my todays.
1 day ago
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