Monday, March 16, 2009

Timing

I may question many things in my life, but one I try to avoid questioning is timing. The Lord has a plan for each and every one of us. It is easy to remember this but harder to accept that things happen for our growth.
For instance, I planned on waiting one year before B. and I began trying to have a baby. Soon, I realizes those plans were not what Heavenly Father had in mind for me. Once I quite fighting, my anxiety quickly dissipated. Then, I became pregnant.
I didn't plan for my pregnancy to interrupt everything so drastically-4 hospital visits, puking multiple times a day, surgery-but I had many blessings that confirmed that we were doing the right thing.
In fact, my pregnancy started with a bang: horrible stomach cramps. I actually did not realize that I was pregnant! I requested a blessing so B. asked a neighbor to come over and help. The blessing did not promise me relief from my affliction, I was promised, from Heavenly Father, that I would be aided through my trials as I looked and found comfort through my Savior and direction in the scriptures. I expected some healing! This blessing warned me that I would have some hard times ahead of me. I did. Yet, I was able to continue schooling and pull off a 4.0!
Once I accepted the Lord's help, I was able to find comfort and relief. Spiritual relief. It was all worth it in the end.
B. and I realized that it would probably be best if I finish school sooner and later. Thus, I began going to school full-time. I didn't think it would be easy, but I definitely did not expect it to be so difficult. Still, I have received verification through blessings and scripture reading that I am doing the right thing. Not only that, but that I would be blessed and helped through my trials. I have been. I feel so grateful with all the time that I have had, even when I didn't expect it.
I still manage to waste time (like right now), but all the hours of the day allow me to get the homework done I need to get done. I know that I am blessed and feel so very grateful.
I have some more trials coming my way, but that is how I can pass through the Refiner's fire and learn and grow.
Timing may seem completely off, but I am so excited for what is ahead of me and I know that in the Eternal Perspective, it is all worth it.

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